Getting Real

"Education and knowledge by themselves do not bring inner peace to individuals, families, or the society in which they live. But education combined with warmheartedness, a sense of concern for the well-being of others, has much more positive results. If you have a great deal of knowledge, but you're governed by negative emotions, then you tend to use your knowledge in negative ways. Therefore, while you are learning, don't forget the importance of warmheartedness"

-His Holiness the Dalai Lama-

The above quote was made known to me by my friend, and although I certainly can’t take credit for the words themselves, I have invoked them wholeheartedly. My presence here is about much more than simply imparting my knowledge of English to my students. Much more. I could be the best English in the world (which I am so far from being!) but that wouldn’t be enough to do this work. I am being challenged and stretched farther and in different ways than I ever could have imagined- some days I can literally feel it. Although my teaching experiences and training have prepared me well content-wise, I feel so utterly lacking in other ways that some days all I can do is fall back on a sense of humor, warmheartedness, and blind faith that I was chosen to do this for a reason…

At the 5th King's Birthday celebration, Autsho MSS

The field looked like a royal court.

As I mentioned in my previous blog, it was the 5^th (I’d like to correct the mistake I made by saying 4^th in my last posting, sorry!) King’s birthday on Feb. 21^st. As Autsho MSS is a brand new school, it has the best campus around; so five other schools in this district came here to celebrate. It was a grand affair. As the hosts, our school put a lot of effort and pride into this day. The students collected green pine needles and spread them on the sports field to make a green “carpet.” The field was set with flags and tents. It looked very regal. 

Reception of our honored guests

Breaking it down Bhutan style!

The chief guests included the head of the Lhuentse Monastery and all the administrative officials from the district. As they arrived, they were received at the school gate through the smoke of burning cypress boughs and led up a path lined with fluttering flags. There was a procession line of traditional Bhutanese dancers and horn players that followed them in and added to the line up. All in all, it was a very impressive sight. To begin the celebration, the culture clubs from each school marched around the field. This was followed by performances of traditional Bhutanese singing and dancing. I watched wide-eyed from the guest tent at first, but soon opted to join my fellow colleagues on the sidelines (much more comfortable for me). The day ended with a ceremonial dance that is performed at the end of all formal celebrations. Not wanting to miss out on any experience here, I eagerly joined. It gave all the students a good laugh to see me trying to act like I knew what to do. It was basically just walking in a big circle, moving your arms up and down. I’m pretty sure they were all impressed with my moves...

View of the altar and proceedings from the inside the tent

The next day was Losar, or the Bhutanese New Year. Due to this, we didn’t have school for the rest of the week, and the District Education Officer was nice enough to take me around to see some remote local schools and villages. One, Domkhar, was under repairs from a mudslide that overtook it last July. It made me feel how small and delicate human civilization can be and is in this place. In the dirt I found a handbook for constructing rubrics and the English Curriculum Guide I was lacking. Very useful souvenirs. Perfect.  I also took the opportunity to go to Mongar, and check it out. Mongar is the largest town in Eastern Bhutan and a hub of commerce for miles around; it’s about a two-hour drive. I went with my friend Neljor and we got a ride there from her friend and then stayed at his hotel that night- don’t mind if I do! It was lovely. She showed me around and I got to see the temple, some new sights, and get some supplies and fresh produce. 

New dining hall being built at Bachu Primary School- about 3,000 ft. up the mountain from Autsho

Mongar town square- donkey included

In front of the temple at Mongar

It was really great to get out to see some more of Bhutan. Since classes have started it is hard to get beyond the reaches of campus; and it’s easy to feel a little cabin fever-ish. Autsho itself could easily fit into one city block. The 400 students who board here all live right around me and sometimes I feel like I’m living in a fish bowl because they try to look in my windows. Having only one day off a week does make it hard to do anything but just teach and prepare to teach. I can’t say that I’m used to working a six-day workweek or happy about it. But who am I kidding? I’m not used to working at all, so anything would be a harsh reality check, I suppose.

At the new teacher orientation

Morning assembly

My first guests- three sisters. They brought me potatoes and dried chillies

I’m teaching three sections of class 8 English and three of class 7 Library (which isn’t really teaching- I just take them to the library or read to them). The sections in 8 are huge! The smallest is 37 students; biggest- 39. The main difference in teaching here is, obviously, the students. Though all the students I teach are in class 8, they range in age from 13 to 19. They are so hardworking and obedient it is almost disconcerting. They stand each time I enter the room and greet me as they bow,“Good morning/afternoon, Madame!” And as I leave, “Thank you, Madame!” (bows again). I know it’s an inculcated part of common procedure around here, but I can’t help but feel a little special each time…Another thing that’s different here is that the students stay put in the same room all day and the teachers rotate. The first day, I almost made the embarrassing mistake of trying to excuse my first class. I like it. I think it creates a sense of unity, group identity, and ownership for them to have their own room; thus they have their own classroom culture- it’s like a little community within a larger one. They all (even the little ones) get up at 5:00 a.m. and begin the day with social work- maintaining the school grounds- and then have an hour of study time before school even begins. I came from a situation where I gave up on assigning homework because it was such a struggle and disappointment to have nobody do it. It makes me realize that things can be different; it’s all about the culture. 

Staff and principal quarters at Bachu Primary School

At the same time, these students aren’t used to thinking critically or independently. They are accustomed to rote methods of instruction/learning and are totally confused by my teaching style, having an open classroom, and true dialogue. They really don’t know what to do if they can’t find the “right” answer in the book and copy it directly. Getting them to think and write for themselves is a work in progress, to say the least. I'm also really struggling to teach to those of my students who don't understand English. Even the ones who do are used to hearing the Bhutanese accent; we’re all confused and having difficulty understanding each other. Most of my students in San Diego were ESL learners, but they could understand the spoken language well. Some of my students here simply do not comprehend the words I speak. I have ascertained that the curriculum is far beyond the capability levels of these students (and at the same time, it’s right on point for others).

Academic block at Zhamkhar Primary

Spinning some prayers...

I have one class that is great and always so satisfying, such a pleasure to teach; I walk out of that class feeling like I'm doing well. Then, in other classes the same lesson goes totally south and I feel like I’m failing my students. There is so much back-teaching that must be done in order to properly explain an abstract notion if a student doesn't know the meaning of the concrete language and concepts leading up to it.... it really goes back to language development and I can draw pictures and act things out, (which I do, I’m sure it’s quite a sight!) but if there isn't some conceptual base, there won't be any comprehension. Like in math, if you don't know the first step, you can't move on, it's a building process. Not to say that the level of thinking is above them; they are absolutely capable of grasping these ideas; but many don't even understand the directions I'm giving them for an activity, let alone the concept related to it. I feel so responsible for teaching them everything they are required to know and to be the best English teacher they've ever had. It's scary to feel like I don’t know how to do that for everybody.

This is Autsho. All of it...

“Oh, you didn’t know?” “I meant to tell you, but I totally forgot.” “How do you do it, Madame?”- Phrases I’m getting very used to hearing these days. Most of the time I feel very out-of-the-loop and like I’m literally a day late and a buck short. These are all inevitable things and part of the process, I know. I'm trying to take it all in stride and appreciate all aspects of this experience. Of course I expected some of this stuff but it's always different when it's really happening. I absolutely love that I'm here, but it's not all perfect; however, nothing is...

I've had some pretty surreal moments when I just realize exactly where I am, what I'm doing, and I just can't believe it. It just amazes me. And then, sometimes feel lonely and like my ego won’t let go of my former self and life. Like all my familiar ideas and thought patters have become so very much a part of my personality, even though many are not positive, that without them I feel hampered, or desperate to sustain some kind of continuity of myself...I still want to go Betty's every Sunday so much! I miss being with my family and friends, in comfortable surroundings, and my bad TV so much, sometimes it hurts. I feel like so much has changed in my life, and yet, I still feel oddly like the same old Reidi, just in the Himalayas..

A Sunday afternoon trek

My trekking guides, Tenzin, Kencho, and Guym

In the short amount of time that I’ve been here, I’ve learned about myself and what I’m made of- both good and bad. Coming to Bhutan has forced me to grapple with the hard-hitting question of “Why teach here?” I’ve realized I may not have been entirely clear about this before I left. I knew I wanted to improve, but improve what? Myself? Yes, that is why I initially came. But now that I’m here, I realize my time here needs to be entirely focused on what I can give to Bhutan, not what I can get out of it. I will spend this year living with the soul purpose of giving everything I possibly can and have to this school and my students- being truly and just of service. I’ve always known I would choose a profession that would allow me to interact with other people (kids) in a meaningful and significant way. In this way, I consider teaching a true vocation- a calling. I make NO claims to be an expert at what I do, but I have clearly identified my intentions and recognize a certain capacity within myself to get there. Bhutan will help me. It already has. Hopefully someday I’ll actually be good at the teaching part, and more than simply well-intentioned and warmhearted, but for now, that’s what’s getting me by!

Da-ri gi nim de-lu Tashi Delek yea! (Have a nice day today!)

-Reidi

More pictures of the birthday festivities- student dancers

Starting off the ceremony

 

Bird's eye view. My house is right in the middle of this

This is why driving here scares me!

Moving On, Moving In

"Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,

the world offers itself to your imagination

calls to you like wild geese, harsh and exciting-

over and over announcing your place

in the family of things"

                                               -Mary Oliver, Wild Geese

Kuzuzempo la! I am happy to report I am still very much alive and thriving here at Autsho Middle Secondary School; so much has happened since my last installment it’s going to be hard to summarize these events in any kind of orderly or coherent way, but here goes nothing…

Preparing to leave Thimphu was a whirlwind- everyone frantically trying to finish all necessary shopping and get mentally/emotionally geared up for an entire year “out in the sticks,” so to speak. Nobody knew exactly what to expect at our postings, so stress and apprehensions were reasonably high. Still, we managed to go out in style, have a great time with each other, and made the most of our last few days together. Some returning BCF teachers, Vicky, Ian, and Scott, came to the city to help us “Bhutan babies” out. They were really supportive in helping us shop and answering a bombardment of logistical questions we had for them. Scott kindly gave us the rundown on what to do if we get bitten by a dog, concluding by saying, “If you display signs of rabies, you will die!” Haha! Ian prevented me from forgetting my rice cooker at the store. Vicky’s warmth, humor, and candor were comforting to us all. Thanks, guys! They took the long route (as if there is a short one) back to their postings in Eastern Bhutan so they could tour the country and actually met up with me here in Autsho on their way- a welcome reunion! They gave my new friend and me dinner, more advice, helped me fix my broken water filter, and got to tour my school- all very pleasant. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

The last few days in Thimphu were peppered with dinners and teas in which we were joined by various government/education officials and dignitaries, the caliber of which a lowly teacher such as myself would never have the good fortune to hold audience with in the U.S. It goes to show the priority Bhutan puts on education and the level of respect the Bhutan Canada Foundation has earned within this Kingdom. The directors, facilitators, logistical coordinators, and managers of the BCF have worked incredibly hard to bring this all to fruition. The effort and extent of commitment these people have to the cause is inspiring. Thank you, la. I am humbled and honored to be a small part of this I will do my best to uphold it’s well-earned reputation.

 Druk Wangyal- 108 chortens

Dochula

Lopen Lungtaen Jamtsho,and BCF Executive Director Nancy Strickland

We all left on a Saturday morning in several vehicles and met at Dochula, a monument built on one of the peaks between Punaka and Thimphu (two districts here). It was founded in 2003 by the Queen Mother in tribute and appreciation of a successful military coupe in which Bhutan drove menacing insurgents outside its boarders; her Husband and Son both fought in this battle and returned unharmed, thankfully. “La” means pass between the mountains (it’s also said after hello, thank you, good day, or really anything else as a sign of respect or understanding, la). The site is aptly named. Cresting at right around 10,000 ft., it is pure opulence. As special guests, we had the honor of a guided tour and were allowed to go up to the second level of the structure to get a close look at the most intricate, ornate, and colorful mural that depicts the history of Bhutan painted on the walls. We then got to enter a room built specifically for use by the Royal Family for tea and rest when they travel- sacrosanct ground- a very exceptional privilege, indeed. Nobody likes a bragger; but let’s just say it wasn’t too shabby. Then, we took tea with the Director of Institute at Dochula, Lopen Lungtaen Jamtsho, and the Representative for Bhutan of the World Bank, Mark LaPrarie, who came to Bhutan to teach, much like we are, in the 80’s. See- there is hope for me still! Then, we walked around Druk Wangyal- 108 chortens built on the same site- and departed for the duration.  Three teachers staying in the West went back to Thimphu, while everyone else piled into a small school bus and one SUV for the most notorious road trip any of us are likely to have.  

I’ll skip over the painstaking details, and yes, they were painful at times. Sufficient to say, I had been dreading the driving part of this whole deal because I have a “slight” fear of heights, but my worst nightmares couldn’t even compare. I have also never been car sick before, but the hairpin turns and constant jarring had me turning green. Three days of this. I totally lost my appetite (which also never happens) and at times, the will to live. I’m only kidding, sort of…

River at Wandue

Taken right before suja and my first yak sighting!

Yeah. That's a good mile just straight down!

Yet if you just look out, this is what you see!

Ok, ok, it was beautiful, sure. In between the nausea, brake downs (both vehicular and for some, psychological), road blocks, and utter terror, I had some pretty special firsts: suja- Bhutanese butter tea, wild yaks, wild monkeys, some wonderful history lessons, courtesy of Meena, and sights that stirred a beautifying knowledge within me that moved my soul to recognize sublimity.

All that being said, I was very relieved to be done driving on that third day, yet sad to say goodbye to my friends, with whom I so quickly and easily bonded. This area and my school are undeniably beautiful, however. Autsho is in a canyon with towering mountains on all sides and a rushing river just below my brand spankin’ new campus. I am staying in the sick room of the Matron’s quarters, which is good-sized, and I have everything I need. Still, it’s an adjustment, and I can’t say I wasn’t scarred to face this place on my own. The reality of life here can be rough, and I’m not experienced in this kind of living- i.e., self-sufficiently- as I proved to myself on the first day when I almost set my new quarters on fire by neglecting the water boiling on my gas stove. The flames burnt the plastic tube connecting the tank to the stove and, WHOOSH!  I flailed myself over there just in time to cut the gas before it exploded. Whew! A good lesson to learn on the first day considering I have to boil every ounce of water I consume, so I’d better get good at it.

That's my house right there

This burned for 3 days

Fire was determined to get me, I thought, as the next day a huge forest fire broke out while my principle and I were driving back from doing business in Lhuentse. I took it as a humorous sign of fate. The drive was treacherous because the fire was burning on the mountain directly overhead and when the grass and shrubbery burn away, rocks become dislodged and plummet down to the road upon which we were driving, nervously, quickly. When we got back to campus, I was dropped off and told “It’s ok, it won’t come down this far.” Sure. Thanks, that’s comforting. Seriously, I could have thrown a rock and hit that fire. I would compare the reaction of those around me to the frog that stays in the pot of water until it slowly boils. I was thinking, "At what point is it ok to get alarmed, here??..." I was trying not to be a wuss, but it just didn’t seem logical to sit and watch a huge fire line descend towards my home and not do anything. So, I the second night I was here, I calmly re-packed almost everything I brought, just in case. However, close as it got, it never did come down all the way, even though the people who live in a hut right above me had to throw water on it to keep it from burning their home. Therefore, I turned out to be the overly-concerned American I guess I am. If this is any indication of the way the rest of the year will go, then we're off to a great start!

My all-in-one nook

I don't have hot water or a shower, so I figured out how to take my first sponge bath over the drain in my bathroom floor. I've never really taken conservation very seriously, awful as that sounds, but not having electricity, hot or pure water, washing my clothes in a bucket, and eating as a vegetarian all feel surprisingly natural; this lifestyle is nurtures me deeply. Sounds pretty corny that I would be proud of things as simple as figuring out how to rig my clothesline, boil water on my gas stove, and sweep with a broom made of grass, but it goes to show that it truly is the small things.

Bhutanese broom

My principal is a great man and very happy I’m here. I think he really likes me, thinks I'm spunky, positive, and will be a good teacher. He sized me up right away and in the first 5 minutes of talking, he said he thought I should join the men's volleyball team. I have even made some good friends already. Madame Neljor and Madame Sonam Choden: wonderful ladies who are teachers here, too- they live on campus too, have taken me in, and made me feel very loved and welcome. Neljor came in my door that first night as I was ferociously scrubbing my bathroom, wearing a headlamp no less because was no electricity. I looked a complete mess, but she came up, hugged me, and insisted on putting herself to work. She made my bed and organized my clothes as I violently kept trying to kill the stink that perpetually ekes from the drain in my bathroom floor. It’s an ongoing battle…The point is, I can tell that everyone really wants me to like it here, be happy and comfortable, and have high expectations.

New friends Neljor and Sonam Choden

My principal, Sangla and myself

Mountains on all sides

In our first staff meeting and I came out as the class 8 English teacher, head of the Humanities department (I think- these things aren’t always as concrete and clear as they are in the West) and am in charge of the Literacy Committee. I’ve been busy planning and have made year-long plans for everything so far. I’m really excited to start working on the projects I have come up with, particularly a cultural exchange via letters with students from Los Angeles. It’s going to be so great; I can see how interested these students are in Western culture!

The first day of school was the 15^th; but I have yet to start teaching in the classroom because there are so many administrative matters to work out with the student boarders and new transfers, sections, etc. Only in Bhutan does school run for a good week before any “teaching” happens. It’s nice because everyone gets time to get back into the swing of things, plus it’s given me additional time to prep. Feb. 21^st is the 4^th King’s birthday, so after getting the students registered, sectioned, and settled in, we begin planning for and carrying out the celebration in honor of His Majesty. Therefore, it will probably be another week at least before I can say anything conclusively about my actual “job.”

Kuri Chhu River, just below campus where I run and play

The community of Autsho is very small and simple, yet there is a rustic beauty about this special place. A small smattering of light and life nestled in juxtaposition to the magnitude of the landscape.There are about 5 or 6 small shops carrying very basic supplies, staple food items (potatoes, cabbage, cauliflower, chillies) and beer, lots of beer. Tendrils of smoke spiral into the air from wood burning stoves and fill the air with an essence of country life. Cows, chickens, dogs, and children roam freely, and the atmosphere is lively and hearty. As the only Westerner here, I do stick out in appearance and behavior, yet a large part of me already feels very deeply connected to it all.

I can say that the students all seem very sweet very curious about me. I am the tallest person on staff, which makes me the biggest woman, (and maybe human being) they’ve ever seen. I walk through campus and everyone bows courteously, “Good morning/afternoon, Madame!” Then, as I pass, there are the invariable giggles and whispers as I’m sure they have all heard me singing in my room, or have seen me going on runs, maybe doing yoga on the big rocks next to the river like a crazy person. Really anything I do seems different and odd to them, I’m sure. I can’t wait for the day when we’re all comfortable with each other. There is NOTHING more adorable than these little ones in their kiras and ghos, so it’s high time we make friends so I can properly bask in the full glory of playing with and loving them like I plan! At morning assembly and the students chant and sing. I didn’t know what was going on at first, par usual. Everyone fell silent and put their hands in prayer position. I just followed suit, and then I heard the most, enchanting (no pun intended) sound I ever have. The males carry a deep undertone and the girls sound like little chimes. It gave me chills through and through and I thought, “This is the way we should all start each day…” Luckily for me, I get to.

It feels good to finally come to where I will be indefinitely. It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to say that. I hope it’s not so long in until my next post, but I can’t promise anything. My Internet is sketchy, at best; hence the laps in communication (and no pictures yet, boo!) Thanks for bearing with me for this long!

Blissfully, Eagerly, Lovingly,

-Madame Reidi

All decked out in the national dress

Another group shot in front of Dochula

Simply amazing!